"HAY TOOL IS THE BEST YOU ARE FUCKING TARDED JESSUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOOL WRITES REALLY REALYL LONG SONGS LIKE 10 MINUTES? !HWAT OVET BANDS OVER WRITEN SONGS LIKE THAT?> THA'TS WRITE NONE!!!! DANNY CARREY IS AN AMAZING DRUMMY AND MAYNARD IS AN AMAZING SINGERAND AND HIS LYRICS SPEAK TO ME LIKE NO OTHER LYRICS HAVE YOU WEVER WRITEEN A SONG AS AMAZING AS STINK FIST LYRICLLY? IT'S ABOUT FUCKING A GIRL UP THE ASS WITH YOUR FIST!!!! YOU 'RE PROBABLY TOO BIG A PUSSY TO EVER DO THAT, BUT MAYNARD HAS!! AND THAT SONG ABOUT EBEING DRUNKJ ALL THE TIME IS ABOUT HIM TOO! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT IT'S LIKE TO BE MAYNARD, YOU FUCKING PUSSY HE'S LIVED A HARD LIFE FOUGHT HIS ATTLES AND WHAT HAVE YOU DONE? YOU RUN A DAMN WEBSITE, YOUR MOMMY AND DADDY PROBABLY HELP YOU OUT IN EVERYTHING! ALSO MAYNARD IS HOT TOO AND YOU PROBALY THINK SO TOO, KYOU FUCKING FAGGOT TOOL IS THE BEST BAND EVER FUCK THE BEATLES FUCK THE STONES FUCK YOUTR STUPIID OTHER BANDS YOU LIKE LIKE VAN HALEN I MEAN COME ON VAN HALEN IS A SHITTY GUITARIST COMPARED TO ADAM JONES THAT AMOETION IN INS HIS PLAYING IS AMAZING! FUCK YOU FAGGOT FUCK YOU OI'M GOING OT KILL YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
i mean they might just e-mail you threatening to beat the shit out of you! or worse send you an e-mail like this: Wow somebody has some balls! to give a negative review to any tool album, let alone be as negative towards the band as you are is a dangerous past time: tool fans are generally as crazy as the band themselves pretend to be. I just want to say one thing: Tool is the most overrated band of the 90's/00's, only maybe beaten by System Of A (Eric B.) Oh, it didn't? Well, "What? Me Worry About You?" Heh heh. Say, did you enjoy that "Yecch!"? Didn't it feel like you were reading Mad magazine for a minute there?
They're friends with the Melvins though and a couple of them love Neil Hamburger, so they can't be all bad! The band is too slow to kick ass and too melodically limited to excite my pleasure centers (which reminds me - Come excite your penis at Mark's Pleasure Center!). In other words, if you sit down to play a Tool song on your acoustic guitar, you'll more than likely find yourself (a) playing a mid-80s Megadeth-style bass line or (b) alternating between two or three tedious barre chords that are right next to each other. I just personally can't get into them because no matter how much concern and exertion the band and its producers put into the *sound* of each song, the riffs themselves seem to be based on a big block of air. Their lyrics are generally as negative as my assessment of their music, whether they be threatening rape or making bold, revolutionary statements like 'Christianity is bad.' I wouldn’t argue that the band "sucks out loud" - the music is far too taut, technical and well-performed for outright dismissal. The band plays a tremendously heavy, at times funky, at other times industrial, at most times boring set of up-down-up-down two- or three-chord combinations in most of their songs, but augments them with exceedingly tight rhythms, melodic vocals and lots of artsy quiet parts (so you have to keep turning your stereo volume up and down and up and down - almost as if you're performing one of the band's riffs!). Stool special introductory paragraph Opiate EP Undertow Aenima Salival Lateralus 10,000 DaysĪmerica's Tool is a much-respected heavy metal band containing such lasting figures as guitarist Adam Jones, extraordinarily gifted drummer Danny Carey, bassist Justin Chancellor (who replaced original bassist Paul Of'Love) and hilarious black comedian Maynard Keenan Wyans.